What are you looking at?

Few things transcend class and society better than the above phrase. It was something said fast and often in my hometown of Oroville. People there would stare you down, get in your face, yell, cuss, flap their arms, and in a few rare instances, even fight. Naturally a lot of it was just puffing up their feathers to look tough, since not a lot of the guys there were very big or tough and could get pasted by their wives.
You don’t usually hear such a direct confrontation too much in the City. People are pretty frightened of just about anything here. They try to avoid getting in the face of other people and avoid conflict whenever possible. I actually don’t like this, since anger doesn’t go away if not released. It comes out in little bursts that are pretty crazed. I’ll see people trying to kill each other when they both go for their favorite water at Whole Foods, or better yet, come at each other with salad forks when one person overhears another sending back a particular varietal of wine they really like. It’s a very strange thing to watch and I wish people would knock about each other a bit more. Some physical adversity is also good; a little character building if you will.
So, here we come to me, walking up from the Bart along Cyril Magnum, my little shortcut to avoid Powell when coming home. Don’t get me wrong, I really like Powell, it’s just really slow to walk through during commute times. Anyways, as I’m walking up the street, I look across and see that a car has gotten The Boot.
Now, The Boot is a beautiful thing. I don’t have to worry about it because I don’t drive. Most other people don’t have to worry about it because they pay their parking tickets on time. The Boot is reserved for only the worst offenders in ticketdom who don’t pay their tickets and let them build up. If you see someone with The Boot wrapped around their front tire, it’s because they’re simply assed-out and finally gotten caught.
So, as I was staring at The Boot on this car, I see there’s a guy in the driver’s seat listening to the radio. I’m looking at him and what he’s doing and I’m thinking, “No way, this guy is going to try and drive off with The Boot on his car.” That just isn’t possible. Well, it’s kinda possible as shown by Homer Simpson when he drove out of NYC with one on and tore up the front fender of his car. Not possible in real life, but here’s the guy and it looks like he’s going for it. Oh yeah, I might add that if he did get some momentum going, he was parallel parked and would have had to nudge his way otu of the that before loping down the road with Said Boot.
In all my fascination, I didn’t notice that he was starting back at me while I was staring at his predicament. Upon noticing me, he yells out, “What are you lookin’ at?!! Move on bitch!” Normally, one isn’t too in to being yelled at like this, but I looked at his car, him, and most importantly, his Boot, and could only laugh and walk away while he kept yelling and cussing at me.
I know I was being rude and staring and he was probably justified in yelling at me, since I wouldn’t take to kindly to people staring at me if I had that happen. But, I make sure things like that don’t happen to me and god damn, it was just hilarious.