Two Blades is Bestest

One problem in sticking to old technology that requires replacement parts is that one day, the parts will be damn near hard to find. I am finding this to be the case since I am a slacker with a two-bladed razor and I refuse to make the switch to >3 blades.
That’s not completely true as I did one day a couple years ago try one of those three blade things because I got it sent to me free for some reason. They don’t work. They’re too tall and hard to maneuver. I went back to the two blade and it’s worked fine. It’s just that people really only want to sell those damned three blade contraptions now. All the generic makers want to do three blades or whatever. If it keeps up, I’m going to switch to a straight razor and be done with it. No more Gillette. No more Schick. No more nuthin’ but the cold hard steel of a blade that can kill which I sharpen on the backs of my dead enemies.
Of course, until that day comes, I’m down with the two blades. Also, I’m down with this Onion razor article that shows how stupid all this business is. God I love the Onion.