How I generally view Bart riders

The big different of course is that human Bart riders have opposable thumbs which make the manner in which they open a door with two hands, a foot, and sometimes a newborn child all the more painful to watch. That and a Dachshund stuck in a sweatshirt is much, much cuter.

When I see people lurch from car to car while the train is in motion and then unable to really get up the escalator in any form of normal speed I think, “Well, at least it will be a slow, trampled death when we’re all trapped down here because there ain’t anyone gettin’ out alive in this here train.” Instead of fearing public transportation, San Franciscans should fear themselves.