I never really knew you and if I saw you on the street, I’d never recognize you and you would probably not recognize me… maybe. I only know you through your bright red Ikea chair in your living room. You see, your apartment window was directly across the street from mine and I would walk in to my living room to see you sitting in yours. Maybe you had the same reaction, but I’ll never know. Don’t worry, you can’t actually see anything at this distance, except for something like a red chair. Maybe you could see more in to my apartment? Maybe I should close my blinds further than they are? I suppose I shall never know now.
I speak in eulogizing tones because one day I walked in to my living room and saw that your red chair was not in yours. In fact, there was nothing there and it was dark and bare in your apartment. I can only assume that you moved. It’s probably for the better. Had we ever met, I would have never known what to say really. “Hi, nice chair.” Sounds a tad up front. “Hey there, I think you live in my neighborhood.” That’s pretty lame and sounds like I’m going to sell something. Anything to say is made even worse by the fact that you might recognize me and that my trying to be coy would just seem creepy.
Well, to wherever you are folks, I salute you and your chair. Best of luck in life.