Buy this Water and I will Punch You. Hard. Where it Hurts.

So, due to an article by Wronging Rights I came across two stellar items: Ethos Water and charity porn. The later I won’t go in to as their article is fantastic. Read it, you’ll love them as much as I do. It’s the bottled water that hurts my soul though.
So, I don’t hit up Starbucks. Ever. Living in San Francisco, there are so many great cafes and there is no need to ever go to that corporate schmuckhole of a place. That being the case, I was completely unaware of Ethos Water, a water you buy to provide clean drinking water in… well… let’s just say that $.05 of your overpriced bottle of water (free at home I should remind) is going to the Starbucks Foundation and supposedly you’re helping people by doing this. From there, once the administration takes their chunk of money for running the foundation (hopefully less than is wasted in the UNFPA), it goes here.
Okay great. If people I know go to Starbucks, fine that’s your business. You really shouldn’t, but I’m not gonna stop you. If I catch any of you buying this crap water with the idea that you’re actually helping someone, I’m sorry, but you’ll have to be hurt. I can beat you senseless with the water bottle or I can just punch you. It’s your choice, but you do indeed need to suffer since you’re helping to create a company that was bought by Starbucks proper for $8 million. Kind of ridiculous for what is to be a helping entity. And the Wronging Rights girls are really correct in saying that attaching a do-gooder adjective to a product is definitely in this Christmas, apparently usurping the position that “green” held last year.
Buy this Water and I will Punch You.  Hard.  Where it Hurts.