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Last year, I merely celebrated Saint Jordi's Day in the fashion that one should when one's household is half Catalan. But this year, through amazingly skillful planning I was actually in the heart of Catalonia to see the celebration at its fullest in Barcelona, Girona, and Figueres.       My original post last year talked about how this is the Catalan equivalent of Valentine's Day in the US. This was mostly true, but I discovered that there is another angle to it as well. Since it is just a Catalan holiday, it is also a time for Catalan pride and nationalism to come out and shine for the day. The best way to put this in terms that Americans would understand is to say that Saint Jordi's (George in English) is a blend between Valentine's Day and the 4th of July. Probably an odd concept to wrap your head around initially, but when you're in the thick of it, it makes a great deal of sense.       It isn't a celebration that's just in Barcelona, although that is the center of it. You see celebrations of one degree or another through every town throughout Catalonia. You see roses and books everywhere. I have to say that despite seeing some guys walking around with a pile of roses to give to all the women in their families, the guys get off easy. They only have to get the flowers. Women have the harder part in trying to figure out what book to get the guys. After all, that is the exchange; a rose for a book. But, this is changing these days and there are those couples who both give each other books.       Of course, much like you can find all things "stars and stripes" in preparation for the 4th of July for the US, you can find all things roses and red/gold (the Catalan colors.) We had lunch in a place with a special St. Jordi's menu with the red and gold colors splayed across the dishes. There was a tea shop we went to where they can "red" and "gold" teas with rose petals. And absolutely, of course, there are Catalan flags everywhere, both displayed and to buy. One small thing to note for those visiting Catalonia on this day is that beyond the fact that it's one of the few days when locals outnumber tourists on Las Ramblas, there are different Calatan flags one will see and there a reason for this. There is the standard one of red and gold stripes, which is the official flag. Then there is another one with a red star at the top of it, which is the flag for an independent Catalonia. A small thing that most might overlook, but it is a definitive statement. The only Spanish flags you'll see out during the day are the ones for the old republic, which Franco overthrew in his coup that consist of a flag of red, yellow, and purple. A salute to what could have been better times 60 years ago I suppose.       It's a fun holiday and a shame that April 23rd never really gets that much coverage in guidebooks to Spain for some reason, as it's a cool to witness and you don't have to be Catalan to do the whole rose and book exchange.

While in Madrid, I had the chance to see the film Elegy, which is yet to be released in the US. Rarely has this been the case as movies released in the US often take 1-2 years to make it to Europe, so everything that in the English language is playing when I visit here came out forever and ago.       Despite being an English language film, the reason it has come out so much earlier is because Penelope Cruz is Spanish as as well as the director, Isabel Coixet who is actually Catalan. So, without spoiling the ending or any plot bits for those back home, I'll kick out a review a bit ahead of the curve, since it appears to be getting a limited release when it does come to the US at the end of June.       Overall, I didn't much care for the film. The script is decent and the directing is quite well executed by Coixet. The cinematography is quite good as well. But, the film just never really clicks. To a large degree, I blame the producers and actors. Ben Kingsley and Cruz should never have been put in the same scenes together. Their chemistry is awful. I've never really cared for Cruz's acting that much and this is just another example of her not really shining. In the scenes where she doesn't appear and it's just Kingsley, the film works quite well. It happens to showcase what is probably the best performance by Dennis Hopper that I've ever seen and the scenes with him and Kingsley are great to watch. The scenes with Patricia Clarkson and Kingsley also work very well. It's to the point where I'm wondering if it is indeed the producer's fault for working to get Cruz in to the film for her name or if there is something that Coixet was trying to do with Cruz and Kingsley that didn't work or I didn't get. I don't think that it helped that these were the first bedroom scenes that Kingsley has ever done in his 40+ years of acting.       On a completely subjective note, the story is also something that didn't really appeal to me. It's set in New York and is very much what I consider to be a New York type of story in that it's a pandering view of a few individuals who don't have to worry about any real life concerns (like paying the electric bill or cleaning the shower.) At no point did I ever really feel like I was given a reason to give a damn what happens to the two main characters. Not good.       On a five scale, I'd probably give it a two and a half. It might appeal more to some than others, especially for those who live in NYC and must love these types of films as they keep getting produced. If however one is a tremendous fan of Cruz's breasts, then by all means, I wish you happy viewing as you will get a tremendous dose.       Watch a small chunk of the film if you're interested.

It had been awhile since any updates to the whole I'm Huge category. This was mostly due to the fact that my life in US America is built more to my large requirements. Now that I'm back in The Europe, I'm again reminded of my ogre-ocity.       Last year, I wrote up a bit about how, I'm Huge on Vueling. Well, I gotta tell you that Vueling was dreamy compared to trying to fold my 193cm of height in to the seats on the Iberia flight I took form London to Madrid. While Vueling designs their seat rows on certain flights to not accommodate those over 175cm in height, I think that Iberia must build for around 150cm. I was screwed in those seats and then of course when the turdle in front of me reclined his seat, I was just completely out of luck.       It's true it was a short flight, but it was still two hours of me doing my best impersonation of an accordion. Just another airline to cross off my me-so-lanky list...

Yeah, I know, I won't shut up about jamón. It's freakin' delicious and the only place I can get it in great abundance is in Spain because Spaniards love it so much that they don't want to export it to the US in any large amount. Now that's a smart people.       One of the first experiences (as well as the best) that I had with jamón was at this place in Figueres called, La Cabaña, which just means, 'the cabin'. They make their own jamón from the regular levels up to pata negra, which is one of the highest grades (and yes that does literally mean, 'black duck'.) The place readily makes up for its rather odd location and basic ambiance with delicious meats, cheeses, pan con tomata, and a good list of the local wines.       It's because of the outward appearance that a great many people would probably skip the place. Nestled between a couple of strip club/whore houses on the northern outskirts of Figueres, along the highway to the French border, most people would find it about as welcoming as a gas station bathroom. Dining outside means listening to the large semi trucks rambling down the highway in front of you, but who cares and I think the jamón makes you deaf to the noise anyways, so one can just eat and enjoy.       So, after so much chatting about it, how does one find this place? This is not easy and it's what makes the chase of this elusive house of meats so enjoyable. Their business card says, "At Kilometer 760, exit Highway Number 3 in the direction of Figueres." It's not the easiest place to get to. For those who are bold, I believe that on Google Maps, it's right here, but that's something of a guess without an exact address.

The misconceptions of Spain by those who visit are too numerous to list. At the top are some of my favorites, such as, "They're such a musical people!", "They have a real zest for life!", "It's just a constant party in Spain!" Obviously to assume one thing or another about a group of people, no matter how easy it may seem, paints you the color ass in the end; a color I have known to take from time to time.       Spain is a lovely, wonderful country and I have enjoyed every minute I've been in it, both last year and this, as well as what are to be many more in the future. While the generalizations of Spain can get out of control at times, the ones regarding the fact that Spaniards love jamón are very much true. I love jamón and anyone who visits the country, unless a staunch non-meat eating fundamentalist will love jamón too. And it's also true that Spaniards do enjoy life on what may seem like a greater level than those living in Northern countries. They also enjoy the sun more simply because they actually know what it looks like, unlike when one lives in London.       But for visitors, when you ride the train from the Barcelona airport to the center, you may find that things are even better than your guidebook would have allowed you to imagine. If for instance a group of 10 sixteen year-old girls get on and start singing and clapping "flamenco style" without any prompting, suddenly all those stereotypes seem a bit more real and a grin springs forth from your jet lagged face as you get ready to hit the Ramblas, sangría, and those damned sombreros.       Once again though, things aren't what they seem and truth is in the eye of what the tourist wants to believe as true. The clip I posted below was from when #1 Fan and I left the Barcelona airport two days ago. A group of drunk, trashy, suburban girls got on the airport train to go in to the center. No, this was not the Spanish zest for life you hear in their song. These were a group of Catalonia transplants being about as classy as a strip club as they went out for a Saturday night on the town, bottle of Fanta mixed with vodka in hand, jabbering away in Spanish, not Catalan (again, how is the Spanish language in danger of extinction in Catalonia?) Have a listen and enjoy. And be on the listen for ¿porque no te callas? somewhere in the middle as they quote the "genius" of the king sometime back. The kids are still loving that one.

Yes, that's right, Madrid has fired a warning shot across the bow of the design world in Spain. Their aim was pointed squarely in the direction of Barcelona, Spain's design center. It's just that this attempt comes somewhere around two decades two late.       This all boils down to the new Terminal 4 and I suppose the number one issue I have with the new terminal (which is the newest and most heavily designed of the four) is that is was just done so that Madrid could thumb their noses at the rest of Spain and dance around singing, "Neener, neener, neener. We're the capital. Ha, ha, ha-ha, ha." Definitely not the best approach for a country dealing with extremely strong and prevalent secessionist groups.       So, instead of spreading out the flow of air traffic for intercontinental flights like we do in the US, they decided to force everything to bounce through Madrid when the destination is outside Europe. This isn't to say that if you're flying on British Airways or Air France to or from the US, that you have to go through Madrid to get to Barcelona, but if you're flying on Iberia, you damned well better believe that you're going to touch down at Barajas before getting to continue on. So naturally, this construction is going to be self-fulfilling in that there will indeed be much more air traffic at Barajas than say, Sevilla, Granada, or Barcelona because of the mandate to force more traffic to go through there. Such is the thinking in Madrid. And such is the reason that an ETA terrorist blew up a massive chunk of this new terminal in December of 2006. These things don't make people happy.       Looking past the political ramifications of this terminal, there is the fact that it sucks. The design is not something I care for on an artistic level, but that's a completely subjective thing. The biggest problem is that it's pointless and doesn't work. For instance:       What the hell are those big exhaust pipe looking things on the floor? Will they reheat my tea that grew cold from the lengthy ride on the Metro to the airport?       Why are the trash cans only 30 cm deep (a foot for metric-so-scary-land)?       Why is it that when people walk through a door that is clearly marked for those arriving to pass through that an alarm goes off at irregular intervals?       Why can people not figure out how to open the bathroom door to leave?       Why is it that when there is the least bit unfriendly weather (heavy rain in this instance) that they have to only run one of their two runways? SFO runs every damned runway even when there's fog.       And most importantly, how is it in a building that isn't even two years old, the ceiling leaks like a sieve when is rains?       It's for these and a number of other reasons that I vote this 21st century construct a massive failure, despite the fact it won the Stirling Prize; a prize that obviously weights federal masturbation higher than passenger usability. If it doesn't I'm at a loss for why this catastrophe won an award other than the fact it built wavy ceilings to scale never before imagined possible. It's crazy that on so many level, it's actually less usable than LAX despite all the money that went in to this gigantic potato chip.

At this point, I am no expert on Madrid. I've spent nearly three days here and most of that was in the rain. But, it's been a good taste of the city and enough to have a few thoughts on it.       Overall, it's an interesting town. Obviously at 5.5 million people it is the biggest city in Spain and it definitely feels that way with it's massive sprawl, due it's cornfield-esque starting point in the absolute and very flat heart of Spain. So, it's only sensible that there would be a great many things to see in Madrid and a great many things to do. As I mentioned previously, a lot of the activities are based around being outside, but it's the case that there are many things to see indoors as well. The museums for instance, are excellent. The Prado tops the list with one of the most amazing collections of art that I've ever seen. Countless works that I've only seen in art textbooks are here, like the Garden of Earthly Delights by Bosch or Las Meninas by Velázquez among countless others.       Then there is the Reina Sofía Museum, which has a good number of known works, but at a cost of great controversy. For instance, it has Dalí's most famous works, which were basically stolen from Figueres to give this very new museum something to show. Then of course there is Guernica by Picasso which was only supposed to hang in The Prado once it was returned to Spain, but now hangs in the Reina Sofía. Beyond these famous works, the museum feels quite empty and haphazard as the collection was built artificially. But, if you're an art fan, you will absolutely have to go and see these paintings, which is what the federal government was scheming to bank upon.       Beyond cultural displays, Madrid is a great town to walk around. It is relatively flat and there are a lot of neighborhoods to see. The only thing that I couldn't get in to was how austere these neighborhoods were. Maybe it was just the rain, but you'd walk in to one neighborhood and it would be all bars on a street. Then, you walk in to another and it's all restaurants. Then another would be all pensions or just houses. There was no variety to what was in each neighborhood making them a bit off-putting and not terribly welcoming to hang out in. By contrast, I could probably spend the rest of my life in just Eixample or the Gothic Quarter in Barcelona. Lavapies (feet washer in English) by contrast is best for cheap going out and is pretty dead during most of the day.       Towering above all of this though is the fact that Madrid is a capital and capitals have big freakin' buildings. Whether it's the Royal Palace or even just the post office, everything is on a huge, monumental scale that was indeed intended to dwarf the common citizen and make them awestruck at the capital of their country. These buildings are grand and impressive, but not approachable. I think this is where my main problem with Madrid lies in the fact that I have a lot of trouble really digging in to it.       Don't get me wrong in this, Madrid is definitely worth visiting, but if you haven't seen other Spanish cities like Barcelona or Sevilla, make it a city of less priority on your Spain checklist of sites. Any trip of 3-4 days there is bound to be a great time; especially if done when the weather and thusly the businesses are more welcoming. After all, a 1.50€ glass of good red wine in a bar and affordable jamón in the restaurants, is pretty hard to beat when it comes to startin' up the good times.

My first visit to Madrid has been unfortunately tarnished a tad by the fact that the weather is crap. It is the case that Madrid in general doesn't have the best weather in the world though (freezing cold winters and blistering hot summers.) Given that it's the middle of April one would have hoped for better than 10C for the high (about 50F for those in metric-so-scary-land), blustery wind, and constant, drizzling rain.       The reason that this is such is an issue, is that unlike London where the entire culture has adapted to crap weather, everything in Madrid is focused around being outside. The piles of chairs and tables sitting sadly by the doors of the cafes readily attest to this fact. It's also the case that everyone thusly runs indoors when the rain hits and if one is a tourist, then that means running in to museums, which get quite packed because of the rain.       Throughout all of this, I kept having the rhyme about the "rain in Spain" going through my head. I suppose that one outcome from this and the fact that I am most assuredly not a musical fan in any way shape or form is that I found out that this chunk of text is from the musical, My Fair Lady. It's scant solace for two days running around in weather that I wasn't prepared for, but I'll take it.

I am often told by certain Spaniards that I know when grabbing a couple of samples at Whole Foods or Cheese Plus that the free sample model doesn't work in Spain. Well, it does in that people will gladly sample whatever you have to offer and sample it fast and in hoards. In fact, if one is not careful in how the free samples are handed out, a flock of Iberian locusts will descent and ravage whatever there is in no time.       So, let me set up the video below. This is at a tourism trade fair somewhere in Spain. The fellow at the beginning is talking to the guy filming, who is about to take somewhere around 100 umbrellas out to the trade fair floor as promotional items. Once he leaves the safe confines of the staging area, hilarity ensues:       

For those who don't know, Arnold Schwarzenegger happens to be a very brilliant actor. Those aware of his moment in Eraser where after many attempts to have a "Deep" moment with Vanessa Williams, after one too many cuts, he finally yelled out, "I'm not an actor!" should take heed. For, accusing him of flubbing lines and sounding about as smart a lump of cheese at times, is ridiculous. And to support my argument, I submit this evidence:              I mean look at that. Okay, I admit that it's not perfect Shakespeare, but it's surprisingly good for an action actor. Oh yeah, it happens to be in Spanish as well, because we all know that Arnold is pretty awful in English. I don't know why he hasn't stuck to Spanish all this time as he is much better in it than English and it would have gone over even better with the Hispanic population in the last election. Oh and in case, you were wondering what his line of 'Hasta la vista, baby' would be in Spanish (since it loses something when speaking Spanish lines in Spanish), check out this.       But, it all seriousness, it is obviously the overdubber that gives Arnold a better tone in Spanish. It's quite funny actually, since in Spain all of his movies are dubbed in to Spanish and it's always the same guy doing it, so people thought that Arnold actually sounded like that or something like that. It came as a rude shock once he became governor (again, I still have trouble accepting this) of California and they suddenly heard what he really sounds like. And naturally, a great many of us cried as he was sworn in to office as the first governor of the state unable to say the name of it correctly. Viv l'Kalifohrniya!