How to Lock (Prav) the Back of your Humanscale Freedom Chair

I've really enjoyed my Freedom Chair ever since buying it. Yeah, they're freakin' expensive, but what is the cost of your back worth to you? My back happens to be worth about $850 in a good chair to me.

The only really big catch with these chairs is that you can't lock the back to prevent reclining and in turn, slouching. This has all kinds of side effects that aren't good. The shoulders get messed up and if you already have bad posture like I do, things only get worse. I tried and tried to find a solution out there, but none seemed to exist, which is strange given that other models from Humanscale do allow the back to be locked.

So entered the prav. At first I came up with the crazy idea of drilling a hole on each side of the support and sticking a pin in these holes to allow the reclining back to be both locked and unlocked as they should have done in the original design. Quickly, I realized that this solution was too elegant (ie time consuming). Instead, I discovered that there are two plates on either side of the bar under the seat that are just above the recline pivot point. If you take a strand of two of bailing wire and wrap it through one of these holes on each side and then loop it around the bottom, it effectively stops the chair from reclining.

Keeping true to my praving roots, I made sure just to twist the wire ends together and leave some nice sharp edges that I'll undoubtedly curse myself for creating whenever I go to move this chair some day. Because these are just three strange of 1.6mm wire under there, they'll undoubtedly break eventually, thus requiring more wire to be added. Thankfully, the wire is cheap and of course if I ever want the recline back, I can just cut the wire. Overall, a prav well done. Oh, in case you're wondering why I didn't use proxy bailing wire--a coat hanger, it's because there was no way that I get the coat hanger to bend enough to pull it through. That and bailing wire is too soft. If one is out praving, there is a careful balance to be maintained which is to fix the thing just well enough to make sure that you won't have to fix it again for a long time, although it will indeed need fixing again down the road because hey, you praved it.

27 02 2009      0 comments

Tags: praving

SF Dachshund Owners are Odder than their Dogs

Seeing as how I can't have a dog in my apartment and the family dachshund is old and back in Spain, I often have to get out to doggy events to enjoy all the fun of dog ownership without actually having to scoop up any crap. Last Fall, I hit up the Pug Sunday. I was a little hesitant about it at first as I wasn't sure how people would react. We brought some treats just in case both dogs and owners were cool with the dogs getting treats. As it turns out, they were. In fact, they highly encouraged it because man, that's treats they don't have to buy and those puggies love them treats like crazy. The dogs ran around, people chatted, and it was a generally good time; photographic proof here.

Seeing as how dachshunds are cool and there is a dachshund event much like the pug one, except out at Pine Lake Dog Park in the Sunset, we went out to it. Things were a bit different though. For starters, I discovered that San Francisco dachshund owners are really weird. They baby, protect, shield, and smother their dogs like the worst parents you can imagine. I mean, they're dogs. When it comes to Black back in Spain, he basically gets to run around where he wants to and we only hold him back if he's about to run in front of a car. He could care less about getting anyone's attention, but if people want to try and pet him, they can. Hell, he even has his own Facebook page. He's got a lot of freedom.

Very quickly, things went downhill for us at the meet up though. We brought along treats again and very quickly the dogs found them in a coat pocket. Assuming that this must be okay and emboldened by previous pug experiences, we offered up one of the treats to one of the dogs. This got the immediate response of his owner running up screaming, "Don't feed my dog! Don't feed my dog! He has strict dietary considerations! What did you give him?!!" I was tempted to answer "Chocolate laced with methamphetamine. Why? They love it." but I thought better and told her it was just this basic doggy treat thing, which she proclaimed terrible and then went to scoop out of the dogs mouth.

Now, I fully admit that we were at fault in giving a dog a treat he so desperately wanted, but at the same time, this woman was nuts. For starters, these treats are nothing big. They're just meat stuff that every dog on the face of the earth loves. But while the goodness fact can be debated, what in the hell was this dog doing outside if he's that fragile? Dogs are dirty, dirty creatures. They'll eat anything they find, including crap by other animals. They also love licking either their own genitalia, or other dog ass. It was just an example of how over protective, over bearing, and just ridiculous some of these people were.

Of course, after that point, we were labeled as, "the feeders" by everyone's eyes who saw this woman go nuts. Thankfully, she took off quite soon, probably to force her dog to vomit lest he lose his dainty figure and not be able to perform in the doggy ballet. More doggies filled in and it was interesting to see that in addition to dachshunds coming in an insane amount of variations (like this crazy guy), they also come in a lot of personalities. They can be quite stuck up and foul-tempered or they can be very friendly and outgoing. I guess that's the bad part about the breed is that in addition to all the health problems they have later in life, it's really a roll of the dice to know if you'll end up with a lover or a fighter, although whatever the result, the dog will always be cute.

As the dogs started to disperse, we did meet some nice folks at the end. One couple came with three dachshunds and a French bulldog they were watching for their daughter. They were nice folks and we had a good chat about all things dachshund as well as finding out that French bulldogs are a pretty awesome breed. Would I attend another one of these dachshund things knowing what I know now? Most probably not, but you can see all the photos of the event. The Frenchie Friday however sounds most appealing, although we will keep the treat giving in check.

26 02 2009      0 comments

Tags: dogs, san francisco

When the Grandg Openin is a Problem

It's not often that I feel as if one of my random photos needs an article of its own, but here we are, with the photo below. I saw this along Taraval down in the Sunset where apparently the G crosses O. I mean, what happened here? This isn't some simple misspelling (nor me screwing around with PhotoShop), but a completely abortive attempt at sign making. And it's not like they couldn't send it back once receiving such a lump of sign from whatever little brother it is that is making signs around there. The 'Grandg Openin' was a separate piece and I even thing you can buy that bit at just about any hardware store around. I'm mystified as I'm sure many a resident in the area is as well.

24 02 2009      1 comment

Tags: language, san francisco

You're Nobody Cos I'm on a Boat

Awhile back David Cross pulled some stunt where he rode around in a limousine, standing out of the sun roof yelling, "Look at me! I'm in a limo! I've got $75! This limo is mine for two hours! Limo! $75!" Or it went something like that, since I can't seem to find the clip on the great expansive void of video that is YouTube. Anyways, the boys behind Incredibad took this to a new level and pretty much summed up most every R&B video that involves boats, which is a surprising 78% of them.

Naturally, as I'm late to the train on this whole thing, I've only recently discovered Jizz in my Pants, which is only more brilliance. While something of a new take on Inner City Pressure, it's still fresh.

23 02 2009      3 comments

Tags: humor, music

Did Tristan da Cunha Inspire Lost?

Through various stumbles across the interweb, I came across a 'twit' that was something along the lines of, "Who in the hell lives here?" If you zoom out, you'll see that this is an island that is exceptionally remote in the Atlantic Ocean. The name of the island is Tristan da Cunha.

I'm not joking about how remote the place is. It's 2,816km from the nearest mainland port, which is South Africa. There's no airstrip on this island, so everything needs to be trucked out there by boat. Why on earth anyone would bother with making the trek out there? Well, amazingly, there are 271 people living on this island. And no, it's not some lush, tropical place. It's classified as 'subtropical' which means that it's between 6-13C throughout the year, which makes it a bit colder than San Francisco and probably with fewer hipsters. Okay, there might be one as they seem to be everywhere.

As I was looking at this place and thinking about the recent episode of Lost, because really, Season 5 has been great with the time traveling and all, I wondered if the creators of the show got some of their inspiration from this island? It's extremely remote and for the longest time, it was only found accidentally. Those people living there have been there for a long time and are completely self-contained. They won't let anyone start living on the island and have a very closed society because of it. Of course their official website is happy to promote tourism, because hey, why not.

Anyways, for those that know Lost and feel like reading about this island, you're bound to see some similarities. Obviously there are a great many differences as well, but I was just quite fascinated by this little place perched in the middle of nowhere.

For those of you who remember Season 1 of Lost and the horrific scenes of the Oceanic flight breaking apart in the air, this article is by a fellow who survived a similar experience on an Angolan flight that broke apart on the ground during landing. Wild crap that I hope to never, ever experience.

20 02 2009      0 comments

Tags: geography, television

Beware the BarCrampers

I fail to see how this word hasn't come up in all of the BarCamps that happen. Surely, someone has thought of this word before to describe those who show up to BarCamps with the hell-bent intention of trying to drive it their way to be their BarCamp? If the answer truly is no, then I suppose it is just critical me putting forth this article and the types below to be on the lookout for. And yes, they're always, always guys for three out of the four types. The fourth type can be either gender.

The Fogey Cramper

They're always these old guys who have learned about BarCamps and have decided that they should shuffle on down to the camp and make sure that everyone benefits from their decades (century?) of experience. I swear that there must be a Grateful Dead soundtrack constantly running through their minds as they are completely deaf to anyone else including the main speaker. They blurt things out all the time and have either lost the use of their arms or are simply unwilling to ever raise their hands to mention something. Typically harmless, yet very much like a mosquito in that they're always buzzing away somewhere in the room. One I have gotten to know well is pictured on the left.

The Me Cramper

These guys show up, plunk down, and no matter what the session could be about, they will immediately and forcefully try to pull everything about the session to be all about what they're doing. The best part is that they usually come halfway in to a session as the previous one has broken up due to them and so, they enter a session of no knowledge of what was previously said and covered. This one guy who I have encountered several times now (pictured in the center) is categorically and violently disruptive to any session he attends. He also has the most wonderful habit of never registering for events or paying the registration fees and then just showing up. This type is really, really problematic and they force everyone to exercise the "rule of two feet" in that they'll leave a session that this type takes over, leaving him and whomever else feels as if they have to be polite and listen to him. You know the music that plays when the smoke monster on Lost appears? You should be hearing that when this type rears their thick heads.

The Über Cramper

These guys are borderline problematic. They are at every single BarCamp that comes along. They're junkies for it. Being the case that they've been to so many, they take on the role of an experienced air passenger who isn't bothered by turbulence and knows the crash rules by heart. Sometimes they can give a boost to a flagging Camp where the organizers have no idea what they're doing. Other times, they try and drag everybody through the rundown like a flight attendant who has been around the world far too many times, yet still has to explain where the emergency exits are. You can spot them as they usually always try to take control of the session signup board and they'll almost always know where the food is before anyone else (which can be useful if you're hungry). Oh yeah, they also happen to often be the guy you see below on the right.

The Marketing Cramper

These folks have gone a long way to killing the BarCamp spirit, which is thankfully just starting to take off in other countries. They come to the BarCamp, seem interesting, but then just do sessions that are all about the product they're there to sell. They're much like "social media experts" who abuse the hell out of Twitter and Facebook without really understanding the format other than to try and sell something... socially. They're simply everywhere and unable to be avoided. Again, the law of two feet is well served here and should be used without any hesitation as these people aren't there to present and discuss, but to sell. It's one-sided conversation and they're my most hated group out of all of these.

This is a rough batch of summations. This is in no way a damning of BarCamps as I happen to love the open, unconference format of the BarCamp a great deal. I just hope that it will live on and grow in different ways, although as I know friends here and there who try to organize them, it seems that the concept is getting lost. Just remember that they're sorta like Seinfeld in that they're a conference of nothing. Yes, there's a theme, but that's about where the organizing part of it should stop and the general group should take over, trading knowledge in a non-Cramper way with others in attendance.

18 02 2009      0 comments

Tags: barcamps

My Ongoing Pain of the Academy of Art

Below is one of the reasons that I will eventually be forced out of my neighborhood by the ever-growing urban herpes known as the Academy of Art. As I've mentioned in previous articles, the Academy has quietly been taking over downtown San Francisco by buying up every building they can get their hands on. This was most definitely annoying, but it was once they bought old hotels and illegally converted them in to dorms (no repercussions for that by the way) that it pushed the pain envelop on co-neighboring with a student population.

And so we get to last night, which has been a long series of nights wherein the academy students have been really partying more for some reason, coming home pitched and insanely loud. It appears that one such group was screwing around at the intersection in front of my building and blocking the street. A taxi who was waiting to turn started honking at them, which then made one of the guys decide to come over an kick the side of the taxi, leaving a large dent. The taxi driver was rightly pissed about this, jumped out and started yelling at the guy which quickly descended in to a fist fight because this whole group of students were wickedly drunk and the taxi driver full of cab-rage. The friends of the idiot pulled the taxi driver back, although they should have let those who start fights, finish fights as I would have loved to see that wispy art student get beat to a pulp by the cabbie whom he decided to wrongly take on.

At this point some cops that were nearby either got called or heard the commotion and came to deal with it. All of the art students took off with some retreating to the dorms on this street and others going further, probably to paint out their angst of the situation while it was still fresh in the mind. One girl was left behind though because as they took off, she discovered she was so drunk that doing a face plant in to the window of a shop and then crumpling on the ground would be a much better idea than running. Obviously, the cops grabbed her and tried several times to keep her upright (really, who gets this piss drunk at midnight?!! 18 year-olds, that's who) while she told them her story and tried to struggle out of her coat for some reason that was unknown to any sane person.

Eventually, the cops called her a black and white "cab" and I assume they hauled her off to jail due to slightly more than obvious public, as well as underage, intoxication. The cops took a report from the taxi driver and that was about it. Overall, I'd say the SFPD did a good job in handling the situation, which is a situation that used to never occur in my neighborhood just a few years ago. Sure, there was the occasional drunk goober going "Woooooo!!!" at three in the morning after the bars closed, but there wasn't this air of living on a college campus without being asked if I would have liked the campus to come in to the neighborhood in the first place.

15 02 2009      0 comments

Tags: academy of art, san francisco

Sorry, your Public Square is Temporarily Unenjoyable

For the last few days, the wide, flat roof of the Union Square Parking Lot, which is sometimes known as a public square has been occupied by some temporary building of some kind. I don't know what it is, only that there are many of these such things that happen there.

This is the current state of this public square, which has been seen in this incarnation since 2002. Oddly enough, during the dedication, the mayor at the time, Willie Brown stated: "Use it; it is your square"

There are many times that I would like to actually take Willie's up on his proclamation, but it's usually the case that there is something in the middle of the square. Yes, sure, these things benefit the public in theory as they are open to the public, but why on earth do they need to be plunked down in the middle of one of the very few outdoor spaces in a very densely packed downtown center? It's been a constant state of annoyance as, when the square is clear of things, it's a decent spot where cafe tables spread out a bit, you can people watch and have some breathing room in the United State's second most dense city.

But the reason for all of this is that the square was completely redesigned prior to 2002. I only have fleeting memories of the old square as it was closed for the rebuild shortly after my starting to live in the Bay Area. While the new square was heralded as this great change that opened up the square, I look at it as a great failure. For those who don't remember the old square, take a look. The new square loses all the green and people space to make way for large concerts and other events to take over the square. Sure, people say that the old square was a problem because of the homeless, but that was more an issue of no one giving a damned about it anymore and letting it fall in to disuse. That could happen very easily with the new square.

To be honest, the way the new square functions and the constant appropriation of the space makes it hardly seem more appealing than this shot from awhile back.

13 02 2009      0 comments

Tags: san francisco, us america

Salesforce.com Foundation just Sounds Dirty

I really have no interest in reading up with the Salesforce.com Foundation actually does out there. I'm so put off by the name, that I just wish it would go away. I mean, why on earth does it have to be called that and not the SFDC Foundation or something along those lines? Because obviously they want it known that they are doing good in the world and good with strings attached is really no good in my book. It reminds me a great deal of when all the corporations locked on to the "Our prayers are with the families" for 9/11 and then included their logo at the bottom of the page. It's ugly, ugly charitable work and I have to say that it's the .com part that really puts me over the top with these guys. '.com' in the name of any foundation is bad. Hell, even Google.org sounds better than that.

11 02 2009      0 comments

Tags: greed, hubris

Praving Rears its Mottled Head in San Francisco

Sometime back, I talked about the paramount importance of bailing wire to your modern pravs. The same holds true with it now as it did then. It's a crucial element without which nothing can be slapped together. I mean really, why on earth would you weld or solder something, when bailing wire is so incredible simple, yet so fantastically powerful?

While there are many other elements that are key to your general praving arsenal (hammers immediately come to mind), there is the often overlooked tarpaulin or 'tarp'. It's a workhorse within the praving world community. It's at once roofing, flooring, insulation, a sail, and every so often, actually just a tarp which you toss over some goods to keep them dry. In thinking about the tarp, I again turn to fond memories of my proud, praving father. On our small farm, we had many an item tarped. There would be small mounds around the property with something or other important being kept under a tarp. In theory, there should have been sheds and garages for these items, but why go to all that trouble when a tarp that costs $2 can cover in a matter of five minutes. Naturally, the big downside to the tarp is that they really do a crap job, they start to smell, leak and also deteriorate insanely fast through prolonged exposure to the sun. All of this was simply solved by adding another tarp. To this day, I am still digging up old shed foundations blue tarps from the ground whenever I try to organize things for my mom.

So, naturally, I could relate when I saw what you see below (direct link) which is a restaurant in Lower Pacific Heights that obviously got a leaky roof to which they decided to fix with... yup, a tarp. Let me add that this is not new. A Google Street Map from who knows when documented this prav-tarped roof long before I saw it last Saturday. Of course, it doesn't help in the least that it's a place called Pride of the Mediterranean, which is only fitting for the repair job that they did and goes a long way to explain how in the hell this place has a miserable 2.5 star rating on Yelp. I didn't even know there was anything rated that low on the heavily skewed and practically useless Yelp, but I guess they didn't want to pay Yelp's blood money to get the reviews removed. Still, they undoubtedly get business from moronic friends from my hometown who go for the kitsch factor of grubby hookahs to smoke, but I digress.

I suppose the only really problem with the tarp and praving is that in developing nations where conflict has recently occurred, the tarp is actually a truly useful item. You'll often see people living under them as they're quick and cheap shelter that aid agencies can provide. So, there is no way I can completely scorn and ridicule the tarp as it has reached some form of hallowed ground for those in bad situations. However in the case of Pride of the Mediterranean and my father's "inventions", I have to curse the damned tarp in how easy a crappy fix it provides far and wide.

09 02 2009      2 comments

Tags: praving, san francisco